Dwelling Place

After living in an apartment for about 2 years we have found a house. Or maybe this house found us. I fully believe God had this house set aside for us.

A few months ago my husband mentioned he was ready to start house hunting again. We loved the simplicity of apartment life. This 2 year span allowed us to pay off my student loans, buy a vehicle with cash instead of taking on another car payment, give my husband a break from lawn care for a bit, gave me a tiny place to care for and clean. It also allowed us to really focus on being minimal. After cleaning out a giant house with two garages, a full basement, 4 bedrooms before coming to this apartment, I vowed I would never own that much stuff again and I stuck to it.

It taught us to be thankful for what we had, which was each other. We were all in the same small living room most of the day together what beautiful family moments it created. It also caused us to be thankful for the simple items we had in our home. We didn't have a dining room table but we have moveable tables and chairs that function well, for example.

When we got our first house after getting married I quickly wanted it all to have a theme. I had a Celebrating Home party and bought a bunch of expensive decor that didn't mean anything to me, it just filled space on the walls. This house my perspective has completely changed. I want simplicity, functionality, hand made decor from my friends and family and my son. Functional-easy to move and care for- furniture. Lots of empty space we can run and play in.

One of the things we missed about having a home was a garage for sure. My van turned into a makeshift garage and was full of camp chairs, a yoga mat, a stroller, a kid's bike, etc etc. It was a breath of fresh air to unload all that at the house this week and have my van back.

So how did this house find us? My husband brought up the idea of moving before our lease was up end of September. We really didn't want to be in an apartment much past the two year mark so it seemed a good time to start looking. We saw one house. I fell in love almost instantly! It was big enough, but not huge like our first house was. It was move in ready. No big projects needing done. Then I walked out the back door to a community play ground!! I can sit on our deck and watch my son go play at this park! I was sold right then and there.

Living in the apartment I always had to drive my son somewhere to play outside. We were in the middle floor of the apartment building, so we didn't even have a back porch on ground level. I was so excited about the thought of the park, and the nice open yard for him to run and play and ride his bike!

We put in an offer very quickly. My husband wasn't immediately sold on the house like I was. He had his bottom dollar amount he wanted to pay for it and when the sellers countered higher than his bottom dollar we discussed it and I allowed him to lead our family as God commands him to and make the final decision which was not to proceed further with this house.

I bawled. I had allowed myself to become so attached to this house in such a short period of time. It's emotionally draining to look at houses, you can't look at a house and not end up picturing yourself and your family living in it. I had also gotten some hard news from a friend of mine that same day so the house and that news hit me at the same time like a ton of bricks. I couldn't move from my chair. Which seems so silly now that I share that but sometimes grief just hits you and you can't move past it. My husband came home from work early, made dinner, cared for our son. Even though I was not upset with him about his decision. I knew he went into it prayfully and financially sound for us. I have been really focusing lately on my Biblical role as a wife, and why God gave men the responsibility to lead the family. I am WAY too emotional to make huge decisions like this. I am so thankful God created the marriage framework and placed me together as a team with my husband.

It's why after I felt a bit better I asked him if he would do the looking from here on out, then when he found one he really liked I'd come along for the second walk-through. Sometimes we are not ourselves and we need our spouse to step up for us. My husband stepped up HUGE with this house. He saw our finances in our first house and realized we needed to make a change for the better. We would not be where we are today had he not made that decision for us as the head of our household. People thought we were crazy for going to an apartment, and I even thought so too. But it was the best decision we've ever made financially. Simplifying and paying off debt and practicing smarter spending habits allowed us to save for this current house.

My husband had an appointment to view a second house. It sold before he even got to see it. We decided to swap out a couple pieces of heavy-hard to move furniture at that point and possibly get ready to settle into the apartment for another year.

Then my husband gets a call from our realtor, about a week after we had passed on the first house. They were going to take our original offer and throw in a one year home warranty. My husband looked at me and asked, "Do you still want to live there?" My jaw about hit the floor. "Uh YEA!!" Then cue the happy tears!

I've been doing a study in Ephesians lately and during my time of sadness this devotion came up right when I needed it. The study spoke about dwelling in Christ. It talked about a fixer-uper house and how when we first come to Christ we're just like that fixer-uper home. The more He lives in us the better we turn out. The more we allow him into the secret places of our hearts, the ugly messy places, He cleans them out and grows us for the better. I thought of this as I scrubbed the shower at the apartment for 2 hours removing all the gunk from the grout so we could get our deposit back. Jesus does that for our hearts as well. Restoring us to new creations for His glory. As soon as we got possession of the house I immediately came and cleaned it. Making it fresh and new for us to begin moving into. That's how Jesus is with us. We get saved and He cleans our hearts so He can make His dwelling place there. A dwelling is a place to reside and be settled, and also to linger, think over, think about etc etc. When we dwell with Christ, linger over His Word, think about and put into practice His Biblical truths then He dwells in our hearts. It was such a comforting truth for me to hold onto. No matter where we live, whether we're in a house or an apartment or wherever, my dwelling place is Jesus Christ.

We hadn't had a kitchen table for about 2 years, just because of lack of space in the apartment. My son had a plastic, collapsible table that we used for eating, schooling and playing. We had gotten in the bad habit of eating on the couch in front of the TV. In preparation to move I began having him practice eating without the TV on. The second day in the new house he asked to eat with the TV on. I reminded him we had the kitchen table now, and how we had practiced eating without the TV. He said to me, "Mom, I don't think I've practiced enough."

We bought our table from friends moving out of state. My parents picked it up for us and when they delivered it my mom told me they had said, "I know it's just a table, but I'm glad it's going to someone that will eat around it as a family, and will pray at it." I am so thankful for this table and the love of good Godly people that came along with it. I already realize how much I missed sitting down together as a family to have a meal rather than eating on our own in front of screens. We are also praying more often as a family again because of this table. Trust me dear friends. Your thoughts over the use of this table were spot on, and every time I sit at it I pray for your new adventures as you move as well.

Moving with a three year old has proven to be a challenge. I am trying to find joy in it as well. My son is obsessed with rocks so guess what our entire landscaping is? Rocks! he sat with buckets and just filled them up and dumped them out and colored the rocks with chalk <3 It was such a huge blessing because we were stuck at a pretty empty house for several hours waiting on the internet guy to come.

I was worried about "entertaining" him while we were at a pretty empty house for long time frames, but one thing apartment life has taught all of us is simplicity. He was completely content to play with a bucket and rocks, his bike and chalk <3 (the minimalist in me wants to just get rid of all the toys now... but I won't)

We sold a giant heavy dresser that used to be in my son's room and he later told me he missed having a mirror in his room. We walk into the room that was most likely going to be his and what's the only thing left hanging on the wall? A mirror. We were going back and forth about which bedroom to give him and that was a clear sign this room was for him.

My friend walked into my son's bathroom and pointed out how the color on the walls was exactly the same as the color in our first home that I loved!

We were worried about how hot it would be in the house. When we did our walk through it was roasting, but the first two nights we were freezing cold after adjusting the air.

I was worried about how our apartment would get clean. My mother in law offered to watch my son so I cranked up the music and scrubbed, then my husband and I finished later.

God answered all our little worries and even gave us some blessings. People always say they don't see or feel God anymore. Are you looking? Are you seeking? Are you thanking Him for things like these little situations?

I already knew the importance of rest, but with this move I really had to make sure to REST. I went crazy packing and moved 4 loads of things over to the house by myself before moving day. While it was helpful at the beginning it also made me worn out the entire week. I wish I would have slowed down a bit. We also decided to take a day of rest in between moving everything in and then going back to clean the apartment and I'm glad we did. It gave us more patience, and we were more efficient in our cleaning that way. God commands rest and sabbath. It's a gift He's given us. We often forget about that gift, but when we slow down from our fast paced life it's when He is able to speak the loudest to us. I may have missed some of these little blessings during our move if I hadn't taken time to sit down and just breathe.

Our moving crew was amazing! I teared up several times on my drives to and from the house to the apartment just in thankfulness. Both our immediate families were there but also my husbands work friends and my best friend and her husband. They gave up a day kid free from their own children to watch my son and help us move. I will never be able to thank these amazing people enough for making food, folding laundry, hanging curtains, tearing apart and building beds, loading and unloading, sweating, laughing and serving! We couldn't have done it without all of you! And just when I'd think someone was wearing out another person would step up without being asked. God's timing is perfect and when you're working with God's people things fall into place.

We had the entire house set up furniture in place in one day. It was mind blowing! My husband commented it seemed so surreal because it happened so fast. I had a friend visit 4 days after our move in and she couldn't believe we weren't still unpacking and organizing. Our amazing, amazing helpers made that happen. Again thank you. <3

I hung my Holy Spirit You are welcome here wreath on the door the day we got possession of the house and I messaged my mom group friends and said, "It's officially home. Jesus is here" This wreath has hung on all the doors of all my homes. Made by a dear friend. No matter where I live Christ lives within me and He is always welcome here.

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Thoughts on moving with a young child:

-no matter how tired you are, how much your back aches from carrying boxes and sorting through stuff CARRY them pick them up and love them. They need the security of your arms to realize that we're all going as a family to this new place.

-Answer all the questions. I was emotionally exhausted from all the questions my son asked me, but they just are curious and it's a great learning experience. You're pulling out everything you own and they may have never even seen some of the items before if they've been buried in closets etc. Take the time to explain, share stories of where you go the item, how it works etc etc.

-They are entertained by simplicity. I was all stressed out about how to keep him occupied in the empty house for 5 hours waiting for the internet hook up. He played with rocks, explored the neighborhood, ran through the open house. He was just fine.

-Plan ahead. Plan meals ahead of time. Stock snacks at the new and old home. Make them a space in the new home right away for their favorite snacks and drinks so they know right where they are and can easily access them. All the excitement makes them burn more energy and they need filled back up.

-Let them help. He helped pack up some of his toys and clothes. I also purposely kept out light items like the first aid kit, some of his toys, kitchen utensils etc so that there were small things to hold so he could help move too and feel like he was part of it. He LOVED it and had a blast. Our friend was even bantering back and forth with him about picking up bigger items because he was so strong. Sure a few things got dumped out, but it's ok he's 3. I need to remind myself that often with this move.

-Leave their room till last to pack away and first to move and set up at the new house. That way their space is quickly back to somewhat normal. They have their bed, they can get a good night sleep the first night in the new place.

-Do something fun amidst the packing. My son really wanted his dad to come to the zoo with him, so we had to be here for the internet hook up one day, so my husband took the day off and we went to the zoo first before our internet window. It was great to just spend some time as a family before the real craziness of the move set in.